I'm just tired - codesink.io

This will be more of like a diary post, I just have to vent.

I’m just tired of all the medial issues happening. My spinal tap left me with so many complications so I got a blood patch that gave me even more complications and it didn’t even fully work. I still have symptoms of a csf leak. I go to my neurologist yesterday 3 weeks after the spinal tap and he says all the results from my spinal tap arnt even in. He said that he isn’t sure if insurance would cover another blood patch so he then and there decided to give me nerve numbing injections on both sides of my cervical spine. Then he threw me a bunch of migraine medication and told me to hope the blood patch can work itself out in the next few weeks.

I’m just tired. Since the spinal tap 3 weeks ago its just been so hard. I’ve been so tired and in so much pain. I was already in pain and tired before but this is different. Can’t do therapy cause insurance doesn’t cover it out of state since I work remote. I can’t actually let my family or friends know how hard it actually is wasting the entirety of being 25 in my apartment because some mysterious bullshit happened and put my life on hold.

It’s tough. I’ve lost all my friends besides one due to the fact I moved to a new city a year ago and then all this started. I haven’t been able to do anything all year. The simplest things cause too much pain. My pain mgt doc is helping me with pain meds but they make me so tired and out of it but it’s better than being in the pain I would be in without.

My previous life is gone, everything changed in one year. This spinal tap put me over the edge. I was staying strong but this spinal tap is the worst idea anyone has ever had. It’s hard dealing with all this myself. It’s definitely made me stronger mentally but I also don’t want to push myself into depression which I really think I’m going. I’m starting to be more and more numb as the days go on. Just care less about everything. But there’s nothing that I can do about it. I’m stuck where I am and this is my life for the foreseeable future. I don’t have the money to pay for therapists out of pocket. Medical bills have already drained me.

Welcome!

This is a safe place to discuss, vent, support, and share information about mental health, illness, and wellness.

Thank you for being here. We appreciate who you are today. Please show respect and empathy when making or replying to posts.

The rules for posting and commenting, besides the rules defined here for lemmy.world, are as follows:

Rules

1-Posts promoting paid products and services of any kind are not allowed here.

2-All posts and comments must be helpful and supportive. Do not put vulnerable people at risk.

3-Do not DM or ask to speak privately to any of our members unless they specifically request it.

If a person from this community disturbs you in a comment, please report the comment. If you receive a DM you did not request, send a screenshot of the DM in a message to a moderator. This is a bannable offense.

4-Suicide, Self-Harm, Death-- Extended discussions are STRONGLY DISCOURAGED here. First, mods and community members are caring people, but not experts in crisis situations. Second, we want to avoid Lemmy becoming like many commercial social media platforms, where comments can snowball into counterproductive talk.

If you or someone you know needs more help than can be found here, please refer to the pinned resources.

If BRIEF mention of these topics is an important part of your post, please flag your post as NSFW and include a (trigger warning: suicide, self-harm, death, etc.)in the title so that other readers who may feel triggered can avoid it. Please also include a trigger warning on all comments mentioning these topics in a post that was not already tagged as such.